An Ugly Epidemic


Have you ever been in the midst of a conversation with someone who barely had time to look you in the eyes? They asked the standard, hollow questions, as if rehearsed for quickest expulsion. And if that wasn’t bad enough, their gaze was constantly wandering as you answered. You knew that little, if any, of what you said was comprehended. Before long, they flitter off to the next event, leaving you with a case of mild whiplash. You should have saved your breath.

Unfortunately, I have been both the victim and perpetrator of such meaningless conversations. I have many theories for why these interactions are becoming more common. Maybe they are a result of a fast-paced 21st century world. Maybe they occur because most Americans would rather hear their own voice than sincerely listen. Or maybe they exist because most people are completely unaware of the growing problem. But the more I consider this ugly epidemic, the more I believe that it is the result of a “next big thing” syndrome. We are constantly looking to the future, and although this mentality fuels engineering, business and technology, it does very little to build relationships. In fact, I believe that it is not as much an issue of looking to the future, as it is a refusal to live in the present.

I have trouble with that. Truly living in the beauty of today. I would rather daydream about next year, or what my life will be like in ten years, instead of living for today. During the summer I wish that I could be Christmas shopping. In the dead of a mid-west winter, I long to drive with my windows down, the warm spring air brushing my cheeks. Contentment is something that I struggle with almost every day of my life. Just like the person who cannot pause for a meaningful conversation, I find it difficult to stop and enjoy the magic of the here-and-now.

I know that God has given me big dreams and an eager heart for a reason. But I also know that He wants me to slow down. Recently I listened to Bill George, a Harvard professor and an influential businessman. During his talk he said, “Follow your compass, not your clock.” How true that is of me! God has given me desires, but they do not need to be fulfilled right now, I just need to keep moving in the right direction.

So, as I sit in an over-airconditioned Starbucks, sipping a half-melted caramel frapuccino, staring blankly out the window, hoping to find some answers, I can hear His voice.“Be still, Heather, and know that I am God. I have everything under control. Stop worrying about tomorrow. Stop worrying about the next ten years. Stop worrying about the next ten minutes. Enjoy today. Enjoy the relationships I have given you. Enjoy this time in your life. Draw closer to me, and in my time I will give you the desires of your heart. Be still.”