Find yourself first.

        (Excerpt from "Six Things My Little Sister Should Know About Dating")     

           Somewhere at my parent’s house, in a corner cupboard, is a scrapbook filled with my childhood. It is bursting with pictures that showcase braces and acne and pitiful fashion choices. Every time I look at it, I am horrified. Then I become instantly grateful. Grateful that those years have passed and that I made it through looking like a real person. I remember that period of awkwardness when I was constantly outgrowing shoes and boys only cared about Legos and no matter how much I begged, Mom still wouldn’t let me wear mascara.

            At some point, things begin feeling normal again. Then you enter high school and suddenly you are worried about calories and cell phones and who the hot guy will ask to homecoming. High school is great in many ways, and you do plenty of growing up. College is another type of a growing up, though. You start to feel like an adult and everyone starts asking you what you will do with your life. So, you plan for the future, because after all, it’s college and you’re supposed to know what you’re doing. These days the hot guy is a loser, so you start to think about who might be the right one for you. It all gets a little intense. Friends get engaged and married and if you aren’t one of them, you begin to feel like maybe those scrapbook pictures are still your reality.

            It’s hard to get a grip on life when so much is changing within and around you. One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned is that if you don’t know yourself, it’s hard to make a dating relationship work. Either you end up with someone completely wrong for you or you compromise in ways you never thought you would. You leave friends in the dust, make that person the center of your world and forget that you had an identity before you met them. Don’t get sucked in. Begin the process of finding yourself first, and then you will have something to offer in a relationship.

            There are two quotes about this topic that I love. The first comes from the pen of Ralph Waldo Emerson who says, “Insist on yourself, never imitate.” The second is from the wise Dr. Seuss who says, “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” Both of these men understand the importance of finding yourself. Once you discover who you are, don’t apologize for it and don’t change for anyone. The guy who is worth giving your heart to is the one who will love the uniqueness that only you possess.

Don't forget to wash your hands!

(February Devotional--for NHC Westside)

The other day I stumbled across an article from the New York Times that claimed, 25% of men admit to not washing their hands after using the restroom. Ugh! I wanted to gag, put on a pair of mittens and refuse to hold my boyfriend’s hands unless he sanitized those grubby paws in front of me. This hygiene discovery rattled my world. I mean, how hard is it to us a little soap and water? It takes almost no time or effort, and besides that, not washing them is just plain gross.

I wonder if maybe we just get lazy. Maybe we get swept up in the business of life and forget that stuff like washing our hands is important. And then I wonder if we do the same thing with our spiritual lives. Sometimes we get bored or tired or lazy, and before we know it, we have given up on purity. We have stopped spending time with God and asking him to continually clean us. It’s a terribly harsh question, but I think it is worth asking: have we, like the icky men, stopped caring about spiritual contamination?

That’s a dangerous place to find ourselves. Psalm 24:3-5 says, “Who shall go up into the mountain of the Lord? Or who shall stand in His Holy Place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who has not lifted himself up to falsehood or to what is false, nor sworn deceitfully. He shall receive blessing from the Lord and righteousness from the God of his salvation.” From this verse we can see that God honors purity. But that doesn’t mean it will be easy. Purity takes effort and we have to be purposeful in our actions. It is only when we commit to having a pure heart that God will be able to work through us. We must make time to scrub our souls.

During the month of February, Westside will be tackling the issue of sexual purity. As we enter into this month, let’s be intentional about examining our lives for anything that isn’t clean. Maybe it will relate specifically to sexual purity, or maybe it will be another area that needs to be washed. Whatever it is, I know that God is going to honor us for our honesty and willingness to be cleansed. So, here’s to scented hand soap and trusting God to renew our hearts. Bring on the suds!